The Enigmatic Theft of Icha Icha Paradise
by Kimeko-28
Summary: What happens when Sakura decides to steal her favorite ex-sensei's favorite novel? Read and find out. Re-edited and newly posted for your reading pleasures.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Nothing of this is mine, except the story. Characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto… but if you haven't figured that out… you're an idiot XD. **

**I don't think there are any spoilers in here… considering I haven't finished even half of the anime or manga… soooooooooooooooo. And yes. This is KakaSaku. If you don't like that pairing, go dig a hole in your backyard and throw your computer into it. Then you wont have to read this =). **

**Also! This is my first attempt at a Naruto Fanfic, and only my second attempt at fanfics in general… so be kind. Please rewind. I MEAN REVIEW! When you review, even if its to criticize me for being a pervert who likes way older men hitting on way younger girls, at least I know somebody's reading it XD **

**EDIT: This story was originally written quite a few years ago, I believe when I was the same age the lovely Sakura in this story. I am now 28, and have found a long lost external hard drive that housed many old Fanfictions etc. I decided upon a request sent to me on deviantart that I would re-post this story (with a bit of editing). Thank you to Frozenstrawberries of deviantart for prompting me to search around for my old FF stuff. I've really missed this community... it's time I start hanging about a bit more :) **

Haruno Sakura sat in her very large and somewhat industrious armchair and smiled mischievously into the book that was pressed so close to her nose one might wonder if she could actually read the words.

_Toya reached up Akane's slick thighs, enjoying the thickened moan that escaped her lips a little too much. _

"_Toya…" Akane panted and her hips surged upwards as Toya's hand slid over her sensitive flesh. "… We shouldn't…be doing this…."_

_She moaned again as his hands continued their expert examination of her body. _

"_Tell me to stop, and I will." _

_Toya knew that this woman was off limits, but he hadn't been able to resist a challenge. Still, if she didn't want this wholeheartedly, he would leave. Leave her, and this place. Toya stopped his explorations and Akane moaned in protest. Her lust glazed eyes cleared slightly as she focused on him. _

"_Toya… Don't stop… I want you. All of you."_

SNAP.

It was too much for Sakura. Tears of mirth filled her eyes and she wiped them away as she tossed the book to the floor. _How_ could Kakashi read this absolute trash? It would be one thing if there had been just one or two such explicit scenes to be found in the whole book… but unfortunately for Sakura, Toya and Akane had been getting busy on almost every other page.

Sakura chuckled to herself, and tossed the book aside, wiping a few errant tears from her eyes. It was almost forgivable… if Kakashi-sensei was only to be seen with the orange colored novels once in a while. but there wasn't a day… or perhaps even a minute that you wouldn't see his nose stuck in the crease of a well worn bright orange novel.

I wonder if they're like security blankets for him. Sakura pondered absentmindedly. He can't get any "lovin'" in the real world so he just reads about it.

Sakura snuggled down in her favorite armchair, pulled the small woven blanket that covered her legs a little higher, and sighed contentedly.

This was the perfect ending to a perfect day of much needed relaxation.

She was now 22 years old and one of the most talented medic nins on staff at the Konoha hospital, no thanks to her lackadaisical former Sensei. He could be blamed for many things, one thing among them being that he was one of the most perverted men in all of Konoha, Jaraiya aside, but he could not take credit for her incredible talents as a ninja.

Tsunade, who had put her through vigorous training since she was twelve, was the one responsible for the very gifted ninja that Sakura had become. Sakura was no genius like Neji or Sasuke, but to her credit she had become nearly as talented as they were through hard work and determination.

Sakura absently wondered who she had been trying to prove wrong all these years. A small crinkle formed on her brow at the slightly unpleasant thought that began to invade her seemingly perfect evening.

Was it Sasuke? She had been called weak on more than one occasion, and she knew what he used to think of her and perhaps still thought of her. Maybe it had been Kakashi himself. Kakashi had spent most of his efforts training Sasuke and Naruto, and had hardly given Sakura a second glance, seemingly deeming her as the weakling among the three.

Sakura brushed the slightly painful thoughts aside and bolstered her ego a bit. Perhaps she had been brushed off in her early years as a ninja, but look where she was now. She was a top ranking medic nin who had passed her Jounin exams a little less than a year ago, had a plethora of A ranked missions under her belt, and had participated in quite a number of S-Class missions as well. And all that at twenty two.

Yes. Sakura was a very talented, very gifted, very…lonely ninja.

Sakura sighed and peered silently into the quiet room, and a sudden realization hit her.

Sakura was all alone on the night of her 22 birthday, no one to celebrate with her, no one to congratulate her, just a stolen Icha Icha book and an empty house.

Sakura sighed. What a mood killer.

Kakashi glared into the window of a certain pink haired ninja's apartment.

A pink haired ninja _thief_, Kakashi thought to himself.

How she had managed to slip his favorite Icha Icha out of his pocket, Kakashi would probably never know, and she would probably never tell.

Well… it didn't matter whether or not he figured out how she had gotten the book from right under his nose, all that mattered was that he got it back.

Kakashi whined mentally. He was just getting to the really good part… again.

Kakashi slipped away from the window and materialized at Sakura's door.

KNOCK, KNOCK!

Sakura jumped slightly at being startled out of her sad musings and glared at the door.

Now _who_ could that be this late at night?

**PLEASE REVIEW! **

**I would promise you a cookie for reviews… but unfortunately last time I tried to send a cookie via e-mail I had to buy a new computer…. To my credit it **_**looked**_** like it would fit in my floppy drive. **

**Edit: lol... floppy drive. I TOLD you this was old. **


	2. Chapter 2

Sakura grumbled a bit sending the blanket that had covered her legs to the floor where it concealed the stolen goods. It just figured that someone would come and ruin her night… not that she hadn't already ruined it for herself.

A brief light of hope gleamed at her as she wondered if maybe someone had remembered that today was her birthday and had come to celebrate with her. Sakura shuffled to the door quickly and opened it with a bright smile.

"HELLO! ..." The bright smile transformed itself, unbeknownst to its host, into a rather dark frown. Not because Sakura was usually displeased to see her former sensei leaning casually against her door frame, but because inside her home there was a rather telling piece of evidence as to her guilt in the matter of it's getting there.

"Why, hello Sakura."

Kakashi brushed past Sakura and into her small economy apartment.

"What? No smile for your Sensei? I thought you'd be happy to see me on your birthday."

Well. At least _someone_ remembered.

"Here Sakura, I bought you a gift." Kakashi turned slightly and placed his hand in one of his pockets.

Sakura was genuinely surprised. She had never once in her life gotten a real gift from her former Sensei, and now here he was, the only one to remember her birthday, and the only one to get her a present. Sakura felt a pang of guilt in remembering the Icha Icha book hiding on the floor.

"Uhm… wow! Thanks Kakashi-Sensei." But as soon as Sakura spoke the words, her pang of guilt turned to panic as Kakashi pulled the "small gift" from his pocket.

The small gift that was the size of a book.

Wrapped in bright orange paper.

Maybe he just liked the color?

Sakura gingerly lifted her hand to take the gift from Kakashi, she made the move to pull it from his grasp but he held on for a moment. Only when she looked up to him with widened eyes did he let go.

"Well… I…um." Sakura didn't think she wanted to open this particular gift in the presence of its benefactor. Time for an excuse, any excuse to get him out of her house.

"Thanks again Kakashi, but it's getting late now don't you think? I'd better get some sleep. Lots of work tomorrow!" Sakura knew she sounded nervous. Hell, she'd always been a bad liar. And Kakashi could see right through her.

"You should open it Sakura. I really think you'll like it."

Sakura was sure that a mischievous grin was spread across his face, even if she couldn't see it through his mask. The only way to tell he was smiling was by the small crease that formed around his one visible eye.

"… Okay…thanks." Sakura shifted uncomfortably under the steady gaze of her former Sensei. With slightly shaky fingers Sakura gently tore the wrapping off the gift and let out a petite yelp when she realized what she was holding.

A brand new copy of the _exact_ Icha Icha novel she had stolen from Kakashi.

"H-how…how did you know that this…" Sakura stuttered a bit, and couldn't quite finish her sentence.

"Was exactly what you wanted?" Kakashi finished for her. "Oh you know…A little bird told me. I think it was pink."

Kakashi's voice was absolutely filled with amusement. Sakura was no fool. Somehow Kakashi had figured out it was she who had stolen his novel, and had apparently come to retrieve it. Her heart sank a little at the thought. A small part of her had hoped that someone had really come just because it was her birthday… so much for wishful thinking.

"Alright Kakashi-Sensei. You win." Sakura bit out sharply

Sakura wanted him out of here as soon as possible so she could scarf down ice-cream and continue in her sad musings about how pitiful her life was. She walked quickly to the stuffed armchair. Leaning over she uncovered the condemning evidence, picked it up, and stomped back to Kakashi handing the book to him.

"There. I stole it. I'm sorry." The glare she gave him did not, however, disclose anything close to remorse.

Sakura's voice held an edge that Kakashi wasn't quite used to. Well… He'd be damned if he left her on a bad note. It was her birthday after all, and he'd meant for this to be funny, not disheartening. Apparently it seemed that Sakura did not find the situation to be the former.

"You know Sakura… I think you're still too young to be reading my Icha Icha books." He reached out and ruffled her pink locks, but the intensified glare caused his hand to shrink back, whimpering all the way to its pocket.

"Kakashi-Sensei. If you know it's my birthday, then you must be well aware that I am now 22 years old! I'm not a child any more, and if I want to read those ridiculous Icha Icha books, damnit, I will!" Sakura ended in a huff, glaring into his one very bemused eye.

Sakura knew that Kakashi was only finding amusement from her anger. Fine. If he thought this was funny, she would give him something to laugh about.

Sakura took a step forward and placed one dainty finger against Kakashi's chest.

Kakashi drew in a nervous breath… He had seen what those dainty fingers could do to a wall.

Or a door.

Or a man.

"You know Sensei… I was thinking you might just be a little _old_ to be reading those books. With all that _racy material_, I'm afraid that one of these days you're going to keel over with a heart attack."

Sakura smirked triumphantly. Suddenly, she had a plan. Her eyes widened for a moment with the thought, and her grin spread further.

"I'm sorry," She spoke smoothly, her voice defying the mischievous glint in her eyes "but I think I may have to confiscate the rest of your collection… starting with this!" Sakura reached out quickly and tore the Icha Icha book from Kakashi's grasp and jumped away from him quickly, a very large grin now playing on her lips.

Kakashi let out an exasperated sigh. He was _not_ old. Well… maybe he was getting old. No. He was definitely not even _getting_ old!

"Sakura… I don't want to have to force you to give that back to me. But I will."

Though Kakashi was in a seemingly relaxed pose, Sakura knew he could make good on his threat in a moment. It was time to strike a compromise.

"I'll tell you what. You stay here and keep me company tonight, and I'll give you back your book."

Sakura could see that she had startled Kakashi, and she knew that she sounded desperate, but… any company was better than none right? She really didn't want to spend the night of her 22nd birthday all by herself.

Kakashi pinched the bridge of his nose between his index and thumb and rubbed lightly, his eye scrunched closed as if what Sakura had proposed had given him a headache. Maybe it had. Well, it would serve him right.

"Sakura…Why don't you call up Ino? Or Naruto, or even Sasuke for that matter? Shouldn't you be celebrating with them?"

Kakashi moved his hand from his face and found another area to comfort. He rubbed the back of his neck lazily as he drawled out the question. He had come to retrieve his book _so he could spend the evening reading it_… not chatting with his former student.

"I… well you see. Um." Sakura's determined expression faded as her eyes fell to the floor. "They forgot."

"They forgot?" Kakashi paused for a moment and blinked his one eye at her.

"Yep." Sakura suddenly found the inspection of her socks extremely important.

Out of nowhere Sakura felt herself being led… No. Manhandled through her doorway. Two hands at her back were pushing her down the street before she could bat an eyelash.

"Kakashi-Sensei! What in the world are you doing!?"

"You can't spend your birthday locked up in your house. You're going to have a drink. On me."

Sakura could have thought of a million reasons to decline. She never drank. She really did have work tomorrow. She wasn't dressed properly. She really, really wasn't dressed properly. Sakura quickly inspected the baggy t-shirt and shorts combo she was in.

But of all the excuses she could come up with, they were all outweighed. Well… more like out muscled by Kakashi's firm hands pushing against her back.

"Well. Fine. But can I at least put some shoes on?"

Kakashi stopped pushing her and something wonderful happened.

He laughed. It was deep and rich and real.

And wonderful.

"Sure Sakura. Go put some shoes on. I'll be waiting."

**REVIEWS REVIEWS REVIEWS… *coughhackspitchoke* … *ahem* reviews are greatly appreciated. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you so much to all those who have reviewed so far! Be not afraid! I will be posting updates to this story rather rapidly. Sorry it's not instantaneous. I really want to read through each chapter a couple of times and edit it. I'm not a terribly good writer, but I'm better than I was six years ago (or at least I'd like to think I am :P) Any way, The full story should be up in a day or two. This is the last chapter I'll post for tonight though... it's my bedtime! Yay! **

Kakashi watched as his former student walked quickly back into her home.

_What In the world am I doing? _Kakashi asked himself seriously.

But he did know. Seeing Sakura's face fall, knowing that those who were supposed to be her friends had forgotten about her birthday… it had simply plucked a sypmathetic string in his heart. Before he knew exactly what he was doing, he had found himself pushing her out the door. She had just looked so alone.

What he really couldn't believe was that Sakura was really planing on staying in all night on her birthday. Did she really intend to sit in that ridiculously huge armchair and read his Icha Icha all night?

Kakashi honestly had no clue. Sakura was a bit of a mystery to him. She was a workaholic, something that Kakashi would never be. Why waste your time working when you could be doing more industrious things… like sleeping… or reading pseudo porn. But Kakashi knew that while he was a professional slacker, that lifestyle didn't necessarily fit everyone. Damned if he knew why. Either way, he knew Sakura had next to no social life, and she seemed to be okay with it... even on her birthday apparently.

A thought suddenly struck him.

Maybe no one had remembered her birthday, because she hadn't bothered to remind them. It wasn't really a good excuse, especially for Naruto or Ino, who were supposed to be her best friends. Kakashi had remembered, but then again, he had only really thought about her today because he had found that she was the one who had stolen his book. The fact that it was her birthday had been a wonderful coincidence that played right into his little "gift" idea.

Letting people in on the fact that it was her birthday would be just the kind of thing Sakura would neglect. She had never wanted to be a burden on people, so naturally she would consider that simply reminding her friends that it was her birthday would be annoying. The girl had some issues. Not that some of them weren't without cause.

Kakashi had to admit that she had annoyed him when she was first his student, and he hadn't been particularly shy about hiding it at times. She was love obsessed, and had no real determination. That had irritated him then, but Sakura had definitely changed. She had proven to him and everyone else that she was no second class ninja.

And even though he couldn't take even a third of the credit for her talents, he was proud of her.

…

Unaware of her former sensei's train of thought, Sakura was quickly busying herself with trying to find something a bit more suitable to wear than her current attire.

If Sakura _could_ have known what Kakashi was thinking, she would be surprised to find that he was completely right. Sakura _had _indeed neglected to tell anyone that it was her birthday today. She hadn't even mentioned it once. Everyone had been so busy lately and Sakura didn't want to pester any one. After all, it was only a birthday. It didn't matter all that much.

The excuses seemed to comfort her a little at least.

Sakura snagged a cute matching skirt and shirt combo that she had been saving to wear on a nicer occasion from her closet. The little pink skirt hit just above her knees and had one small dark pink heart placed over her right hip. The shirt was white tank, with the same pink heart on the chest. Sakura quickly inspected herself in the mirror. She was satisfied. If she was going to go out on her birthday, she was at least going to look good doing it.

Sakura threw on a cute pale blue jean jacket and her favorite pair of white sandals before heading out the door.

…

Kakashi looked up when he heard the door open and watched as she turned and closed the door, fumbling with her keys to lock it.

He noticed that she had apparently taken the liberty to change more than just her shoes.

Kakashi quickly took in the knee length pink skirt that matched her hair almost perfectly, and his eyes were almost instantly drawn to her hip, where a small magenta heart shifted as she walked.

Kakashi didn't know if it was the easy sway of her hips as she walked towards him, or simply the bright color of that little decoration against the pale pink material of the skirt, but he couldn't take his eyes off it.

He could almost imagine what it would be like to trace his palm against the material of the design… feeling the pressure of her small frame underneath his hand.

_Wait… What!? _

Kakashi shook his head in an attempt to clear his mind of his suddenly lecherous thoughts.

Maybe Sakura was right… he really should lay off the Icha Icha for a while.

As Sakura neared where Kakashi stood she noticed he was not exaclty looking at her. Well... Not exactly looking at her face, and perhaps it was just been her imagination but...

Sakura was sure it really must be her imagination because...

It almost looked as if Kakashi had been... checking her out? His one disclosed eye had lingered just below her waist as she walked towards him and only that she was now nearly by his side did she watch that eye snap back to her face.

Despite the fact that Sakura was _almost_ two hundred percent sure that Kakashi had indeed been day dreaming or spacing out and definitely NOT checking her out... a small blush spread across her face. Even the idea that Kakashi could have possibly done that was just... well, simply embarrassing. Perhaps her former teacher did read pervy books, but she was certain (at least she hoped she was certain) that he would never direct his pervy thoughts towards her.

Sakura silently prayed that she could blame the flush on the cool night air.

Kakashi peered at the woman that was now standing next to him and noticed the rose tint that stained her pale cheeks. He sincerely pleaded with whichever god would listen that she hadn't seen him giving her the eye. If she had, Kakashi was sure she'd never mention it... but still. It was a very un-sensei like thing to do. Good teachers did not check out their students... no matter how long ago the titles of student and teacher were applicable.

All Kakashi could do was hope that the pretty hue that had taken over her features was due to the crisp night air.

Kakashi made a careful show of looking her outfit up and down, purposefully ignoring that little pink heart, and dropped his gaze towards her feet.

"Nice shoes." He muttered finally.

"Um, yeah. Thanks." Sakura mumbled quietly. "I hope you don't mind that I changed."

_Not at all._

"No. That's alright. This is you're night out remember. You're allowed to do what you want." Kakashi held out his arm for Sakura to loop her own through and waited until she did. "Shall we?"

"Indeed." Sakura chuckled quickly at Kakashi's overdone display of gentlemanly-ness... something she knew he most certainly was not. Gentlemen were never late, never read porn in public, and never made illegitimate excuses... but tonight he seemed to be a little different. Maybe she would just take it in stride. She turned her face towards his and smiled, her eyes bright with laughter.

Kakashi's heart skipped a beat. If he thought her sadness had been pulling strings earlier, he hadn't expected what her smile could do.

That smile of hers pulled strings too.

Very dangerous strings.


End file.
